Alternative Rugby Commentary- The Ten Commandments

"Sport is imposing order on what was chaos." - Anthony Starr

So what is my favourite sport? Sex. Next? Rugby. It seems a good idea to combine the two, even if a bit dangerous, however the rugby coach I have been flirting with is such a tosser I don't know if I can be asked! This does not disappoint me. Why? Because Graydog is taking such excellent care of me that I don't have the inclination or energy to chase that idiot rugby guy around! I am aware, my darlings, that as soon as I start getting all fulfilled by one person, I am in danger. My brother said of Graydog, you like him so run because I don't want to see you hurt again. So, I am trying to sort a few commandments for myself. The post heading refers to www.youtube.com/watch?v=cny1i4qyyMo

1. Drink and drug too much to be a good potential partner to someone.
2. Talk shit to potential partners about how promiscuous I am to frighten them off.
3. BE that promiscuous.
4. If the man in question has the upper hand, take it back.
5. Make sure other activities such as -gasp- work are more important.
6. If I find myself mooning over the way a man touches my face or satisfies my body or makes me laugh, distract myself with work and vices.
7. Focus on the faults (c'mon everyone has them!) of the man in question.
8. Take absolutely no advice from anyone who wishes me to fall in love and live happily ever after. They speaketh bullocks.
9. Dwell on past hurts and abandonments to fortify my 'I don't need anyone- I am GATTINA' position.
10. Remember not to cause harm to anyone if possible to avoid guilt and regret.

So now that you know my general game plan, let's get back to the fun details...
I met Graydog after work last night and was perhaps a bit overeager to get him somewhere private where I could enjoy him properly. On the tube and train to his, he touched me often and kissed me as he said, relax. I am high strung, why do I dig laid back men?! After a whole lot of shagging, we curled up and he slept. He is warm and comfortable and affectionate in his sleep... Uh-oh. Back to the commandments with me for being a fuckin'... Ok, anyhoo... He is blasted yummy and I am enjoying my time with him. That said, thank the gods I am getting back to work in a few days!!!
I am off for a drive in the country with my silver fox tomorrow. I'm still punishing him for being a manipulative cock but I can't wait to drive his Aston Martin around Sussex in the sunshine.
-Gattina edits a few lines and realises she has given this blog address to too many people that are mentioned in it.-
Well, if you can't take the truth with a laugh, you certainly should not know me! Here endeth the lesson for today...