Le Jeu Que Tous Gagnons

"Of course, you haven't got to decide, but think about it. I can't advise you in my favour because I think it would be beastly for you, but think how nice it would be for me!" - Evelyn Waugh

You have no desire of your own? I asked. Only to please you, he answered.
Gattina closes her eyes for a moment and then opens them to look into his. She sees his face first dark with anger, pushing her down and ravishing her with his strong cock and sharp teeth. Then she sees him in supplication, eyes pleading for the pleasure she can give. She sees the naked sex on his face when she pauses, mouth full of pussy, to look behind her and welcome him into her heat. She looks deeper and sees the smiles that live in his eyes. She knows that he would do all of these things with her, for her...
The neighbour says it is obvious how in love we are, I teased Reuben, so why won't you just admit it? Do you feel love from me? He asked. Yes. I feel love from you, he continued, so what difference does this word make? I winged a bit and he said, I love you as much as I could love anyone I have known for this short time. The clouds gathered over my face and I choked out that was the cruelest thing he's ever said to me. You see, my dears, there are many people in my life that have freely given me their love for months and even years and yet I reject them in my preference for Reuben. My lovely Roo, who hesitates and worries and waits. It will sort itself, I thought to myself as I lay in his embrace that night.
Breakfast? I asked Reuben as he lay captive in the bath. Eggs? I prompted. Umm... toast? He seemed to be looking for an escape hatch. Ok, toast then, I relented. I came down and made toast, setting out the vegemite. An aside- I have decided to use the vegemite in a spring roll experiment since I believe the taste will complement Asian veggies and sesame. I also squeezed several tangerines and a lime to make juice for my sweetie. I am determined, I said, to put breakfast in your stomach even if it must be liquid. This is my campaign against you. I fear one day, he said, I will be sneaking down the stairs to get out without breakfast and two large rugby players will attack me from the side and start forcing toast down my throat! I looked sideways at him. If this is the worst plot I ever hatch against you, is it so terrible? He smiled and drank his juice.
It was pleasant weather in London yesterday, even with a somewhat bitter wind. I had a nice run and Reuben asked if I would fancy a motorbike ride after work. Certo!! Wear warm clothes, he warned. Gattina sifts through her suitcase full of lingerie and cookbooks. Warm clothes?! Ha! I am a tough mountain girl, no? He must think I am such a wimp! I perused my boots and stilettos for what would look most fetching on the bike. Reuben walked in and looked unimpressed. Warm boots! He demanded. But my only warm ones are Coach and I don't want to char them on the pipes, I complained. Let me see them, he said, you'll be fine- the pipes are under the pegs. I muttered and put the boots on but refused tights since I had on thick jeans. We retrieved his beautiful motorbike and headed off toward Dorking. I had not ridden in a while so it took a little adjusting to relax my legs' grip on his hips. As we headed into the country, I was absolutely charmed by the sun on the hills and the paddocks of sheep with their lambs. We went to the highest cricket pitch in the area and stopped. My legs were visibly shaking from the numbing cold. Are you cold, darling? Roo asked me. No! I answered quickly through chattering teeth. There is a lovely pub at the bottom of the hill where we can stop in for a drink, he said. The Monty Python-esque choir in my head sang a hearty chord. My lovelies, I honestly could not feel my bum!! We settled into a wonderfully traditional, cozy pub and got a couple pints (plus a whisky for me, of course!). I was lamenting not bringing my camera and I was also almost afraid of the ride home as I watched the sun sinking behind a peaceful verdant rise. We went for a smoke and I was already shaking. I climbed on the bike and fantasized about a warm sheepskin (rug, you pervs!!). I love the feeling of acceleration on a motorbike but the sustained faster speeds were driving daggers into my exposed thighs. Please go slower, I begged, feeling like a weak little girl. Grr... At every stop, Reuben rubbed my thighs and assured me we were almost there. I took comfort, if not heat, from my arms and legs around him and his constant consideration. Later, when I broke a dish pulling it from the oven with my unlucky left hand, he rushed from chatting with Suz to my aid. He did not berate me or complain. I waited in my mind and heart for the unkind words or jabs but all I received was kindness. I never believed before that a man existed in this world to rival Jonathan in gentle consideration. I still don't really believe- perhaps my sex, booze, and drug addled mind has conjured this beautiful delusion to torture me.
Ah, but back to the breakfast wars... I employed a new tactic and started an elaborate breakfast dish yesterday afternoon by soaking thick slices of baton in an egg/vanilla/brown sugar/syrup mixture overnight. This morning, while the coffee waited to be pressed, I put the toast in the oven and adroitly (notice, darlings, ADROIT n'est SINISTRE pas!) toasted almond slices in a pan on the stove. I flipped them from the back, the way I was taught, and took such pleasure in this basic task. I had made a mixture in the oven crock of brown sugar, honey, syrup, almonds, and buerre brun. The baton slices puffed and browned as I sliced banana. I am still a little unsure in this recipe so I flipped 2 of the slices but left the other 2. Reuben and I agree that for breakfast, unflipped is good (less sweet) but the flipped, caramelised slices would make a fantastic dessert with a good quality vanilla ice cream a la mode. I was happy to redeem myself after last night's disaster. I will replace the dish and Roo suggested that I perhaps put something in it for the family to have for dinner. How lovely! I am waffling between baked pasta, ratatouille, gulyas, shepherd's pie... I think I will also make some biscuits for the children. I have had such a wonderful time here, how can I show enough appreciation to these hosts that I have never met?! I hope to have many opportunities in the future! Reuben is off to Porto for the weekend and as we kissed goodbye, I mused: Wouldn't it be lovely if we were this happy together a long time in the future without ever having said 'I love you' to each other? He thinks I would die of the unknowing but I really believe it would be a gorgeous and unique thing we could have- by not saying it, we would be creative in showing it. Just a theory...
I leave you with this... I woke up this morning and turned to my lover to press my body to him. I found him hard and uttered a little sound of pleasure as I took him in my hands. He barely opened his eyes and spoke earnestly. Don't mind that... just leave it... no, no Darling, there is no time... I must get up- I have a breakfast to eat!!!