Non Dimentico

'So everything lets us down, including curiosity and honesty and what we love best. Yes, said the voice, but cheer up, it's fun in the end.' - Roberto Bolaño

On the night my Lion and I announced our engagement to marry to our families, we celebrated in an Irish pub in Tenerife with my dear Alex. Alex told the live band (a lovely Irish couple) and they played 'You Look Wonderful Tonight' for us. We danced alone on the floor while the crowd wished us well. I bought the band's cd and am listening to it now. I miss my Lion. I miss my Alex.
I received my THIRD rejected passport application yesterday and could tear my hair in fury. I hate this country. I also received notice that I will be charged for the medics that examined me after Krishna's temper tantrum. Fantastic.
I have not spoken with Krishna. I have been spending my time with mates and running and cooking and writing and healing. I did have a pretty fantastic date last week that you might like to hear about though. :)
I was invited for an orgy of lobster and thought I could use the cathartic experience of murdering something for the pleasure of eating it dipped in clarified butter. The lobsters were massive! Mine went without fuss into the pot but my date's threw his claws out in protest. He seemed to be saying 'Hold on! Wait! We can talk about this!' No such luck, mate. We boiled the lobsters only until the meat set then cut them in half and put them on the bbq with applewood chips to finish cooking them. I could have an orgasm just from the memory of that meal! My date and I intended a film after but as he said before attacking me, 'That would be nice but I'm fucking horny and you're fucking hot!' Next I knew, I was being had on the countertop with half my clothes still on! We did manage to bump my nose once but other than that bit of unwelcome pain, good times. Oh yes. Good times!
I miss Krishna but, you know, I just wanted a brute of a man to help me remember and experience my femininity. I had that with him and I feel womanly again. Cheers, mate.
Some of my prison mates seem to be having a hard go right now and my heart reaches to them. I have not forgotten them or the experience and I never will. I am getting my first tattoo this week. The Union Jack with my prison number worked in. xxxHMPxxx